Extinguish the Fear of Abandonment with Hypnotherapy

Many people in today’s world live their lives in fear of being abandoned or separated from loved ones. It’s one of the most common and most damaging fears we can experience, and can be the result of many things including the physical loss of a parent or caregiver in childhood, neglect and/or abuse, growing up in poverty, lack of affection or presence from parents & caregivers (even if it’s unintentional), and emotional abandonment. Many people are suffering from this kind of fear and aren’t even aware of why they’re experiencing the symptoms of it.

-     Have you ever found yourself hyper analyzing the texts you do or don’t receive from a new partner?

-     Do you find yourself putting your needs aside to keep everyone around you happy?

-     Are you constantly worried your partner will cheat or find someone “better” than you?

-     Do you struggle to bond emotionally with other people?

-     Do you start to feel frantic if your boss or coworker doesn’t answer your email quickly enough?

-     Maybe you consistently attach to new people much more quickly & intensely than they do.

-     Maybe you’re constantly anxious if your loved ones are away or if you don’t hear from them often enough.

-     Maybe you’re always worried you’ll say the one wrong thing and ruin a relationship.

-     Maybe you tolerate things from partners you know aren’t okay so they’ll stay because them leaving would be worse than anything else.

-     Maybe people often tell you you’re clingy or helicoptering.

All of these are common traits of people with abandonment fears. If left unaddressed, they can lead to a vicious cycle that can lead to anxiety disorders, depression, codependency, and sometimes they are linked to borderline personality disorder. In a quieter way, suffering from a fear of abandonment often prevents us from meeting the emotional needs of our loved ones as well, such as our partners or children. Beyond making our own lives much more difficult than is necessary, abandonment fears left untreated can negatively impact those around us, and even lead to our unhealthy behavior patterns being passed on to children, potentially turning into generational trauma that will effect generations to come.

Thankfully, there are ways to alleviate and heal the not only the fear of abandonment, but the original wound(s) that caused the fear to set in to begin with. Hypnotherapy has been proven to alleviate, and often completely resolve, fears of abandonment. This process has 3 main components: identify, retrain, and build confidence.

Identify

         You can’t fix a leaky pipe if you don’t know where the hole is, so first we’ll identify the negative feelings and reactions to abandonment triggers, as well as digging deeper to identify the original cause of the fears. Hypnosis allows us to do this by relaxing our conscious mind, which reflexively suppresses traumatic memories to protect us. When our conscious mind is relaxed and our subconscious is more accessible, it’s much easier to track down where traumas first began and start the healing process from there.

Retrain

         After we’ve identified the root of the fear, we can then begin to retrain our mind/body reaction to our triggers. This is done by introducing new, positive self-talk and habits in reaction to formerly negative stimuli. For example, if we discover that your root cause was your Mom forgetting to pick you up from school when you were 7, you may become triggered every time someone is late or doesn’t answer a phone call. This likely resulted in more traumatic milestones developing when your calls went ignored or your friend was late to a dinner date or a new partner ghosted you. By first identifying each trauma individually, then retraining our brain’s reaction to those traumas, we’ll be able to remove the negative associations with those situations so your conscious brain can react to them more rationally.

Build Confidence

         Another important component to this process is building confidence in ourselves. Lack of self-confidence alone is enough to trigger abandonment fears because we’re so afraid that we can’t do things without someone there to help or protect us. By implementing positive and encouraging self-talk during hypnosis, we can boost our self-confidence so we feel safe and protected and capable on our own. This allows us to approach relationships with others from a healthy perspective so we can experience a more appropriate amount of attachment.

If you’ve found yourself relating to this blog and thing hypnosis might help you take back control over your life, Blooming Lotus is here to help! We offer in person and online sessions and free consultations. Give us a call or schedule online so we can help you live your happiest and healthiest life!